Snow Melted Blood
by Siberian Lynx
Summary: Nobara don't know what to do with herself anymore. She hurts so many others just by living, how can she go on? A story about what goes behind Nobaras child-like and polite gesture. Self harm.


A chill goes through my spine as I my body hits the cold tile floors. The world has litterally turned upside down, it's spinning, waving, whirling, swirling; it won't stop! _It won't stop!_

My nauseaus gaze locks onto a pair of black shoes and legs but they as well warp into a surrealistic view and I loose control of _everything_ as pain wrecks my body, its as if my head is split in two like a watermelon. I scream. And then everything fades.

Shadows starts dancing before my eyes, the walls, the warped floors, everything disappears and all I can hear is a scream echoeing through my own head as I hold my enclosed fists aginst my temple, furiously shaking like a rattle snakes tail. I almost start crying in fear.

And somewhere between the mind of consciousness** and fainting I feel my legs ache as they slam aginst the cold floor in uncontrollable spasms and shakes, someone picks me up so that I am no longer on the floor, ****_my poor body is picked up,_**** I want to do is to scream and fight cause I can't tell whom it is holding me and I feel so unsafe but my body won't allow any free moments and I'm instead unwillingly trashing around like a trapped animal with my eyes seeing only black, my fists slamming into someones chest and my legs kicking. All I can do is to plead that I will be taken far away so that the pain will go away. My last thoughts before I resentfully fade out is of Mikan, either of her cheerfull smile or her flickering, saddened gaze, I can't tell of which.**

I am walking on the stiff bridge of consciousness**.** My ears are occupied by the sound of my own heart throbbing like a drum rather than my disorientated thoughts mingling with a dark, raspky voice n the back of my head.

I am all alone whit my own thoughts, they sometimes scares her so much. It's always like this when I _cross_...

_Wanna die. Dying is fine. Since you wanna die, why are you still alive? Since you don't wanna live, it be good if you died. Hurry up and do it!_

Two arms are draped over my cold, numb body as I regain what is left of my awareness. I can't tell whom dared to touch me in this condition, I'm in loss of control and my alice is making ice materialize and climb upwards my arms. I start recognizing where I am as I let my eyes numbly scan my sourroundings and register what is happening to me. Obivously someone is holding me, were inside a crimson coated room, the air is prickeled with nervous tension in the dead silence. I use the small amount of power that I have and make the ice condensate and disappear, in a few minutes my hands regain sense and starts tremebling.

The being holding me suddenly stops, I am dropped down on a low bench or something that alike. I can't tell if it's one of the ESP's dogs or if it is Persona himself, I should be able to tell the diffrence but my sight is shaded. As for now, I'm sitting, my back supporting aginst a grayish wall as my sight is slowly recongnizing the house as the dangerous ability class.

A hand is stretched out in front of me, it takes awhile for me to register. I raise my own, noticing how much paler it is from usual. I grasp the hand, I see it belongs to Persona as it staggers just awhile, doubting. "_It's warm_"

We walk in silence. I'm to tierd. Persona is he's usual self. He picks me up and carries me up the stairs when I trip and fall, I guess it's a generous gesture but I can't thank him. The usual Nobara knows how to say thank you to everyone, how to be polite and not to bother, but this one, the other one, does not. We stop outside the door to my room, he pats my head and lay a resting hand to my back, then he disappears. I drop dead on the clean sheats of my bed, and then I fall asleep.

Outisde the birds are sitting with their feathers pushed up, their tiny, crooked legs resting on thin, nestling branches. The sun cast metallic shadows through the bars of her window, dreary light filters through, enlightens tiny specks of dusts claiming Nobaras air. She lies perfectly still, almost looking dead, pale with the doll-like curls spreading over the soft pillow. Her deep blue eyes staring emptily at the roof as her mind searches through her memory of last night. "It wasn't _**me**_, it was the other one" she silently thinks to herself. Her left hand raises and she plays with the air until a gleaming ice shard matrializes. It falls restlessy in her hands and Nobara being used to handle ice grasps its nubble middle, it two edges being knife-sharp. She sits up, heavily. Her gaze lingers at the door and she listens, but nobody's there, she's all alone. She then gazes towards the ice shard. It takes only a few seconds to tuck up the sleeve all the way to her shoulder. With her left hand grasping the ice shard she brings it to her right arm, right above the elbow. She things about Mikan for a final moment, her beatiful hazelnut hair, her cherryblossom cheeks and her wide, warm smile, the warmth that she radiated just by being herself. When she grasped Nobaras hand. It felt warmth even though the ice shard felt so cold to the skin. One cut for yeastersays actions. Only one.

Her slim fingers tighlty grasps around the dead ice as it penetrates her snowwhite skin, a horizontal risp empitly lingers, underneath a white layer of skin i visible before blood pours out like tiny pearl-like beads, almost dripping down on the bedsheats.

Nobara walks to the bathroom connected with her room, melted the ice to water and washed the already bleeding wound and covered it with paper. "I'm sorry Per... I'm sorry _Mikan_"


End file.
